Thoughts & Feelings on a Sunday Morning...

It's brisk out.  26F  blue sky and sunny.  No profound words have I but a gentle reminder from several friends about footprints left in the sand on gently placed on the spirit and soul.  Sometimes we forget that words and actions are so powerful.  We negate them because...well after all we are just one person.

A reminder on this sunny January day with a nip in the air that we do each of us make a difference in lives...in the lives of those that we may not see every day, but we do make a difference.  Just be genuine.  Use words and actions wisely.  YOU will find a richness in life that you never expected.

No profound words this sunny day.  Just a gentle reminder that you are not defined by hurtful ugly words from decades ago...uttered by someone who wanted to hurt you...you are defined by your words and actions not by another's.

Compartmentalizing

Compartmentalization is an unconscious psychological defense mechanism used to avoid cognitive dissonance, or the mental discomfort and anxiety caused by a person's having conflicting values, cognitions, emotions, beliefs, etc. within themselves.

Compartmentalization allows these conflicting ideas to co-exist by inhibiting direct or explicit acknowledgement and interaction between separate compartmentalized self states.

Yes that is what compartmentalizing is!  I know I do it under certain circumstances.  Those things that I truly am not comfortable with.  Those things that don't fit into those damn ticky tacky yellow boxes.  OR do they?  Perhaps I really am in one of those ticky tacky boxes looking out.  

Compartmentalizing helped me.  Some could call it denial.  Perhaps.  Some could call it stupidity.  Perhaps.  Survival.  Yes a better word.  It fit in my life at that time.  The unfortunate thing is that when you no longer truly need it...it continues and becomes habit and habit becomes something that becomes how you are, how you live and you don't realize that it is now part of your core.

A Pair of Glasses

I have one pair of glasses.  A single pair of glasses.  Not two.  Not five.  ONE pair of glasses.  Now on the other hand I know people who have many pairs of glasses.  There are striped pairs.  Wire glasses that bend precariously when placed in the wrong places.  Bi-focal.  Tri-focal.  Progressive lenses.  Reading lenses.  Glasses put in obscure places.  Glasses put in every room.  Every purse.  Every jacket.  Every winter coat.  A red pair.  A blue pair.  A striped pair.  A rimless pair.

I have one pair of glasses.  A single pair of glasses.  What does that say about or does it say anything about me.  What does it say of others...if anything.

Just a pair of glasses.  One pair of glasses.  A single pair of glasses.  But they are mine.

Thoughts on a Sunday Rainy Morning...

This is Christmas week.  I am not a religious person by any stretch of the word.  However, I am deeply spiritual or so I would call it.  There are defining moments in our lives...many defining moments and how we choose to use those is up to us.  Conversations we have whether they are voiced face to face or typed via some other medium can have an impact.  A question.  A statement.  Clarity.

Each of has the choice within us to decide what impact those defining moments have.  We can remain static.  Do nothing more then existing.  We can become the victim and let that consume us our entire lives.  Or...we can realize that how we react and deal with it is better.  Give one's self time to absorb the moment taking neither credit nor blame for it.  Moving forward in a positive direction.

For myself I have come to realize at this late stage of my life...this life the one I live now that it is intrinsic for me to pack as much into it as I possible can.  I never go backwards.  Always move forward.  A new adventure seems to always be around the next corner for me.  I breath in life and all that surrounds me and it emerges in my writing...in my photography and in my silks...each one has a part of me in them but then all that is the creative part of me does.

I am so fortunate to have learned what is important and no matter how difficult things/life can be and how choices can be painful at times...you just cannot choose to be static or a victim...active participation is what it's about....always going forward...always being true to the core of you.

Namaste

Roller Coaster...

up and down, over and over, spinning out of control and doing it all again.  What will stop this never ending ride on this roller coaster of life.  Just when I think I have it sorted out...then up and down, over and over, spinning out of control and doing it all again.  How many times?  How many ways?  Stop this roller coaster.

A Monday Pondering...

There are times when life is simply "crap".  No kind or easy way to describe it...it's sucks, it's revolting, it's horrid....but thru it sometimes there is a glimmer...just a little spark.  Someone appreciates the work you put into something that affects them.  Then I realize that in a small way I have affected their lives in a positive way.

And...then it affects me in a bigger positive way.

Monotone...

Monotone….

Do not think monotone really exists….you doubt me I’m sure…but you have to listen to the subtle tones that are beyond the monotone…listen…listen closely – monotone is a deception…hear beneath the obvious…hear with emotion…hear with passion….beyond the monotone.

The tones…subtle changes…the breath…the sigh…the hesitation…you think you can hide the variations in the timber…the range…but you cannot.

Your voice is sensual – that hint of aloofness that makes you even more haunting…more mysterious…closing my eyes…hearing you whisper in my ear…letting me drift off into that place where imagination soars….feeling your breath against me….

Monotone does not exist…I know your voice and the subtle tones that you speak….